Is it all-consuming and taking up too much headspace? Do you spend your waking hours (and even sleeping hours!) agonizing over even the smallest decision? 

If you’ve answered yes to any or all of the above, then there’s every chance you’re totally overthinking your wedding BUT please don’t worry. Firstly, let us start by saying what overthinking your wedding isn’t. It isn’t surprising. Not in the slightest. You see, whether you’re going all out or eloping and having an intimate celebration, you’re getting married and that’s a BIG deal. It’s therefore absolutely normal to want such an important day to be brilliant. Overthinking your wedding also isn’t surprising given how much we can surround ourselves by all things matrimonial. 

We all know how great social media can be for showing us things we didn’t know about or giving us confidence to try something new. On the flip side, it’s getting harder and harder to get distance from weddings when you’re literally carrying the entire industry around in your pocket. So, overthinking your wedding isn’t surprising at all. 

Be decisive.
Nothing kills overthinking quite like decisiveness. If you’re choosing suppliers, do your research and make a decision. If you’re looking at dresses, try them on and make a decision. If you’re selecting menus, taste the options and make a decision. Are you noticing a pattern here by any chance?! If you want to stop overthinking, then make your choice and move on. Don’t keep browsing online, wondering if what you’ve just found is better and don’t let anything knock your confidence. You made the decision with all the information to hand. Just keep looking forward, move on to the next thing on the list and get to work on that. You’ll find you’ll have so much more time if you tick something off and move right on.

Don’t ask for too many opinions.
It’s always tempting to ask for opinions when you’re planning your wedding and I totally get that. You want the reassurance that your ideas and decisions are good ones and it’s highly likely that you’ve never organised anything like this before so just checking in with your friends and family can give you the reassurance you want. Well, it can be useful, or it can just mess with your head even more. Ask 10 people what they think and you’re likely to get 10 different answers. So now you’ve got 10 ideas plus your original thoughts to manage AND 10 people who are now invested in your decision.

Will you take their suggestion and if you don’t, why won’t you? You can see the potential can of worms right there and you’re still none the wiser about what to do! If you need an opinion on anything from your dress to your venue to the details or seating plan, ask one or two trusted friends at most. Don’t ask them for their ideas, give them your ideas as choices and see what they pick. And remember, you don’t have to take advice just because it’s been given.

Take time out from wedding planning.
This is absolutely essential! Your wedding cannot and should not consume all your time from engagement to ceremony. Yes, it takes time to plan a wedding, but it should not rule your life. Make sure that you take time out to do things for yourself and / or as a couple. When I was planning my own wedding, I used to go for a run every evening to clear my head and to stop thinking about my wedding – that sweaty time to myself was invaluable and something that I continue to this day. Time away from wedding planning creates perspective, it’ll give you some essential head space and allow you to focus on what’s really important.

The really important part.
There’s really only one important part of a wedding and that’s that you say ‘I do’ to the person that you love, surrounded by your nearest and dearest. The rest, dare I say it, is window dressing. Beautiful, fabulous and enjoyable window dressing but window dressing nonetheless. Nothing else aside from that ceremony is essential, nothing else is mandatory and nothing else really matters. Focus on the one part of the day that will change your life and everything else is a bonus.

So, be confident in your choices and be sure that you’ve made the best decision based on all this information that you have that no one else does. Accept that whilst some people might not love your plans and ideas as much as you do, as long as you think they’re great, that’s really all that matters. You’re planning your wedding for you and for your partner, not for endless approval from everyone else. Be confident because you’ve got this.